June

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7/22/98 11:33 AM

It's about to rain. I'm out of smokes (net worth: $1.45) so it's back to Circle K for apple pies and pop tarts. I thought I was getting thrown out of Diane's last night. She was talking about sending me down for my mom to deal with for a week or so (like I'm a 33 year old rock-hard fruitcake making its Christmas rounds). MA and I were fighting pretty viciously yesterday afternoon, cause I was really drunk and really pissed off that she's stupid. And she was really meth'd out and really a big dumb-ass screaming and throwing the stapler and a burning candle at me (she broke the plastic handle on the stapler and now there's a chunk of it in one of my feet) and making up brain fart excuses for why she thinks she doesn't suck as much as everyone around her knows she does. And we did it all in front of Wendy, which is a really bad idea because Wendy doesn't do so well with screaming and hard metal objects flying around room denting up the walls and glasses breaking and stuff like that. She gets scared and hides in her house in the back. She told Diane, "They were arguing about who was going to throw who out of the house… and neither of them live here!" She's skittery, but her mind's always right on point. So I stayed in my room in the dark and Diane came in at one point and said, "MA wanted me to come in here and ask The Asshole for a cigarette." I gave her one and said, "Tell her 'Enjoy' and 'Die in horrible twisting agony'." I love being a grown up.