February/March 2005



Angst Man
by
Corey Mesler

“In early youth we wear our nihilism with a certain bravado.  It’s part of our panache.  Then suddenly we’re brought up short with the realization that everything we’ve been so glibly spouting may very well be true. ‘My God! Can I have been right all along?  Surely not that’.”   
Peter Devries    
 
They call it a lump in
your throat, a little
whirly of terror
just because the day is
new.  A tornado with
teeth. What if everyday
this screw tightened?
What if you lost your
key? I walk around
like a scarecrow,
afraid of the birds which
flutter by. This is
it for the next few
years, a lifetime.
I am a man with fear inside
him, like another
organ, diseased though,
and angry like an
ex-lover. I am that man.
I cannot sustain the
disguise for too long,
tired as I am from dragging
the dead days behind me.
Tired as I am of that man.


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